When Two or More of You are Gathered

When was the last time you had family and friends to your home for a meal, to play a board game, or to just talk over a cup of tea? When was the last time you were invited out for any of these activities? If you have children, when was the last time you all sat down at the table and had a home cooked meal together after which you lingered at the table and talked to one another?

I can hear the excuses and they all include the two words “ too busy”.

When the VCR became affordable in the 1980’s our patterns of socialization changed radically. Think back before that time, what did you and your family do before then? For those in their 20’s and 30’s who were born post VCR era, I’ll describe some of my family’s activities. My parents and aunts and uncles played cards on the weekends. They went bowling. They went to a drive-in movie together. There were spaghetti nights and cook outs. Skating parties. Snowmobiling provided much opportunity for fun and socialization, including weeny roasts. We visited grandparents and helped out with seasonal chores. When the parents gathered, as small children we did dress-up, put on plays and shows.  I can’t recall a single time when we were ever parked in front of a television unless it was to watch the Thanksgiving parade or a Christmas special. It was rare that a weekend was spent entirely home, alone. Everyone in this circle of family and friends was working full time (and more), yet they still found the time and energy to gather to help one another and to have fun.

Friends & Family Fun @ the Quarry House

Enter the VCR, the beginning of the end to socialization, as we knew it. As a nation we became hooked on being entertained by something playing out on a screen. The variety of entertainment hooks has grown immensely since the VCR came on the scene. While there are many benefits to our new technology, like being able to stay in touch with friends and family at a distance and the ability to get an answer to almost every question within minutes, we’ve lost something very dear.

What we’ve lost in great measure, is the fun, excitement and inspiration that comes from being together in a physical place with a shared intention. This powerful energetic is still at work in 12-step programs.  It’s also present in authentic Master Mind programs, which have statements similar in nature to the 12-step program.

The explosion of social networking via the internet is the result of seeking that deeper connection we knew as a culture before we became glued to the screen. Communities such as Face Book have value, but can never replace the experience of when we gather together heart, soul, mind and BODY! This can’t be accomplished successfully when done out of obligation.  If intent doesn’t yet come from the heart, it can begin with the mind, from a desire to believe that there is a power in gathering together, that is greater than our striving all alone.

My husband David and myself, were reminded of this power over the winter of 2009. We met together with like-minded friends and acquaintances around the subject of financial permaculture. As a group, we were seeking to understand what had happened to our economy.  We talked much about “where do we go from here?” The results of our meetings did not create anything concrete, like a local currency. We did achieve something quite tangible though. We were able to detach from the mass fear that the financial crash had created and see the steps we needed to take in our individual circumstances. When you’re no longer living in fear of how you’re going to pay the mortgage, the taxes, buy groceries, creativity comes in. Solutions present.

Our attachment to the media as a whole and the tremendous influence it has over our thinking keeps our society whipped up in anger, terror or both. At the very least, it leaves us totally confused about what’s true. These states of being divide us and often send us into isolation. The desire to isolate often comes from a sense of shame, cultivated subtly and not so subtly by the media.

Spirits Gathering

The energy of shame is the lowest point on David Hawkin’s chart of consciousness (Power vs Force, the Hidden Detriments of Human Behavior). Sometimes one has to seek a new group, a new place to gather! When we gather together with sincere, kind individuals, we find that though we may each have a burden to bear, we are not alone. We see the light and good in each other and affirm it. Shame is lifted. We are reminded that life can be good, despite outward appearances.

Whenever two or more of you are gathered in the name of Love, then there shall be Love.  You can replace “Love” with any other quality in this statement and it will still be true. So the power lies within each us, and is made expotential in our gathering together with like intent. We don’t want to let all the power inherent in gathering go to hate mongers and doomsday sayers do we? No!
Please let’s expand on this topic as a group.  I’ll post your emails to the comments or you can type into the comment box, by clicking on comments.  I’m hopeful that this subject will provoke a good, long-lasting conversation and perhaps even some real change.

  • What are your memories of BVCR (before VCR era)?
  • What did your family do for entertainment?
  • What’s your fondest memory of sharing time with family and friends that doesn’t involve a screen?
  • Will you invite someone to your home this coming month for some authentic conversation and/or will you say “yes” if you’re invited out, despite how busy you’ve been and how tired you may feel?
  • Is anybody inspired to put the TV away for a month and limit computer time?

    Thank you to Lauren Gonzalez for watering the seeds for this subject with her recent email comment to me, “There’s no time for TV if people want to be healthy.”

    A special thanks to Nicole Galante` and Michael Kearns for the wonderful Spring Equinox gathering they hosted on the 20th, reminding everyone present of the joy inherent in sharing good company.

    Nicole, Michael & David Harmonic Convergence Fire Circle

    Change does not happen from the top and trickle down. It happens from the inside, out–from within us as individuals, and in our homes, our small businesses, and from within our communities. Let’s be the change we want to see in the world. Let’s take the time and make the effort to gather together and

    Shine our Lights as One!


    It’s all About Water!
    Pot Luck Supper & Showing of Raymon Grace Energizes Water DVD

    Quarry House @ Light Heart Retreat, Photo by Bruce Cassidy

    Joanna & David Buell are hosting a pot luck supper and showing of Raymon Grace Energizes Water on DVD on Saturday, April 10, 2010 from  5 PM to  8 PM at the Quarry House at Light Heart Retreat in Sullivan, Maine. The quarries at Light Heart Retreat are crystal clear and the drinking water is delicious. Why? Because we use Raymon Grace’s dowsing methods for clearing and energizing our water. We also energize water for specific health purposes and much more.  Please join us for a fun evening of breaking bread with new friends and go home with a jug of your own energized water and some new tools for self empowerment. Adults only please. Please call or email to sign up. See contact form below.

    2 thoughts on “When Two or More of You are Gathered

    1. This is an email received from Lauren on this subject:

      Namaste Joanna!

      Just yesterday, we had all three kids (and one kid’s girlfriend) over for a day of fermented food making and beer making! We made lunch together (spinach, brie, and walnut sandwiches on sour dough, with fresh strawberries and hummus on the side), and then had dinner at home as well, all gathered around the table after a successful day in the kitchen. While waiting for one stage in the beer-making to end, we played a card game, Apples to Apples. These “kids” range from ages 18 to 25, an age that many adults dismiss as “beyond” such gatherings, or, unable to focus or slow down enough to play games and make food at home. Untrue. It’s a cop out for those of us who are older to dismiss young people (we’re always griping about their attention spans being too short), when in fact it’s our job to engage them. It’s hard work, yes, but as teachers and people with more experience, this is what we’re supposed to do.

      I get the general feeling that kids are bored. They, too, are sick of TV yelling at them, just like their sick of their social lives being co-oped by Facebook. They crave stimulation, and, I think, want new experiences. We were all absolutely buzzing after a fun day of laughing, eating, and connecting.

      Just before reading your excellent blog, Joanna, I read a news story online about CNN’s ratings going down faster than anyone can explain. Well, I can explain it, I think. People are SICK of FEAR TV. We’ve had it. These are hard times, and we’re all learning that regardless of our beliefs, we ALL wish to feel happy and good. And as you’ve written, our connection with and to others plays a major part in our sense of overall happiness, consciousness, and perception of belonging in the world.

      And just before reading that news story, I had an awful experience with a “techie” at a computer store in town. He chided me for not understanding the “language” of my computer when all I needed was to buy a cord. What Old World thinking, I thought. We have elevated our precious machines to the point of being demigods, and those who work with them sometimes too easily assume the role of servant to the gods, looking down on those of us who do not worship them in the same way. I suspect we will be learning for many decades how to reconnect with humans, animals, and nature, while loosening our “bonds” with these machines, including the TV, DVD player, and even our darling iPhones.

      The man at the computer store clearly uses fear (he tried to talk us into buying a new $600 monitor, so I wouldn’t need the already-overpriced $40 adapter) to motivate most of his customers. He uses indecipherable language (the DVI you need doesn’t attach to the SVA on the blah blah blah)to create an aura of “expert” that leads people to buy things they do not need. Even before technology, the advertising business was perfecting the craft of fear.

      So, thank you, Joanna, again, for tapping into a another source that either leads to or deteriorates our health. And those of us who’ve been around longer than younger people need to take the lead in this. Instead of griping out younger generations, and how we don’t connect, and how they’re always in front of their screens and keyboards, we need to charge and get off our own bottoms to inspire these people, who will one day the be the stewards of this planning, to start living, for REAL, and not in the reality TV sense.

      You’re right, Joanna. We have lost something dear.But we can regain by doing the things (for starters) you’ve listed on your blog. Heck ya, do Facebook. It’s fun. But limit it. I have limited my Facebook check-in to once weekly for ten minutes. Funny, after the first two weeks, I didn’t even need a full ten minutes. I can see it was more fun having everyone taste our homemade yogurt (first batch!) yesterday than spending 7 minutes on Facebook. I always feel very empty after “connecting” through this medium. There’s simply nothing meaningful to show for it. It is great for promoting ideas and events. It’s a bulletin board, though, not a dining room table.

      Having enjoyed the honest, real social environment of the LHR for two years now, I can say that I will miss your potluck with a heavy heart. I wish we could be there. But, in honor, we will host a fun lunch at our house, with friends and family from the area. And no, we WON’T be watching TV (sorry, CNN…not really).

      Peace to you and David, and thank you for your inspiration and insight!

      Love and blessings,

      Lauren G

      Namaste`Lauren! I can feel the fun and excitement of your weekend. The kids got exposed to healthy eating and the idea that they can create this kind of food and experience for themselves, too. I love your approach to Face Book. The time spent on FB could be better used engaging with the people under our own roof or even sending a full bodied email to a friend or family member, versus a sound bite. We’re out of the TV loop completely, so I appreciate the update on CNN. Yes–we’re really fed up. It’s encouraging to see that people in numbers are unplugging from the propaganda that passes as “news”.

      Lauren, I hope you’ll consider hosting a viewing of Raymon Grace’s DVD on energizing water for your friends and family where you live in California. Empowerment–Pass it on! Love and blessings, Joanna

    2. This came via email from Vicki, a new Downeast resident, from North Carolina via NH:

      I would be most honored to join you, David
      and friends for this enLIGHTening and
      scrumptious event.

      I concur with your premise that we have
      lost much to technology. My Mom took the
      tube out of our family t.v. when I was
      15. That drastic measure created a family
      of readers who would share events of
      our daily lives at the dinner table. Reading
      has been a life long gift created out of that
      one act of deprivation. More is not always

      With love and anticipation of another
      gathering of hearts,


      P. S. Should we bring our own vessels for

      Namaste`Vicki! Wow! You’re mother was very wise and very brave. I imagine there was quite a loud response from teenage children to having the tube removed.She gave you a wonderful gift, the pleasure of reading.

      We’re so happy you can join us on the 10th. Yes, please bring a container to energize water in and bring a smaller one to energize with a personal intention. Actually bring as many small containers as you like, if you have people you’d like to make some healing water for. Love and blessings! Joanna

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